When frustration is...a good thing?

My 5-year-old nephew LOVES Target. It’s his personal wonderland, his present-day Toys"R"Us. Lately, he’s been obsessed with games meant for older kids—especially train and Pokémon-themed ones.

My sister, being the wise mother she is, warns him:

"You can have the game, but it’s for kids who are older. It might feel hard, and you might get frustrated. And that’s okay."

My nephew, wide-eyed with determination, fully agrees. Yes, I understand. I am willing to feel frustrated. I will do my best, and whatever I can do will be good enough.

And yet… can you guess what happens next?

The inevitable meltdown.

The game is too hard. He’s overwhelmed. He’s sobbing in frustration.

And my sister, calm as ever, simply says:"I know, baby. This game is for 7-year-olds."

Lately, this memory crashed into my awareness because, well—

I do this ALL THE TIME.

I take on something big, knowing full well it’s a stretch. I revel in the excitement of playing in the big leagues. But when the challenge proves to be exactly as hard as I signed up for, I find myself melting down—feeling defeated, frustrated, wondering why I’m not “getting it” faster.

Can you relate?

Maybe you’ve set a massive goal and are now stuck in the messy middle.

Maybe you’re comparing yourself to people who seem to be breezing through something that feels like an uphill battle for you.

This is why I keep habits in my life that humble me—like CrossFit. I still, after all this time, catch myself looking at the prescribed advanced workout thinking, I got this. And then reality sets in—the weight is too heavy, the volume too high, and I have to scale it down.

But here’s the thing:

frustration is a sign of learning.

The longer we can tolerate staying in that discomfort—the “frustration zone”—the more we open ourselves up to real transformation.

🔥 At a cellular level, synaptic connections are being formed.

🔥 At a material level, mastery, abundance, and achievement are being built.

🔥 At a spiritual level, we are refining ourselves and releasing ego pride.

Where in your life are you stretching yourself right now? Are you in the frustration zone?

And more importantly—can you meet yourself with patience and compassion instead of a meltdown?

This is the work. This is mastery.

Cheering you on, always.

With love,

Dr. Steph